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Overcoming Loneliness
This month's Saint on the Street
Mary Ames, Reporter (Rush Creek Ward)
Saint on the Street
The monthly feature where we ask member of our stake questions and advice. This month’s question:
Loneliness seems to be an epidemic these days. What would you tell someone who is struggling with feelings of loneliness?
Kilee Nickels (Kellybrook Ward)
One thing I’ve realized is that more people feel lonely than you might think—often, even the busiest people do. You can’t always tell who’s feeling that way, so it’s safe to assume you’re not the only one.
I’m someone who’s always busy, but I still love to be thought of and invited—it makes me feel remembered and connected. So, take the initiative to reach out: send a text, invite someone to lunch, or ask questions that help you really get to know someone. The next time you see them, you’ll already have something meaningful to talk about.
If you’re looking for structure, join a self-reliance class—it’s a great way to get to know a small group of people in a consistent, intentional setting. And if you’re on social media, try to engage instead of just scrolling. Comment, message, or share encouragement. Real connection comes when we take small steps toward others, even when we’re feeling alone ourselves.
Coltyn Suitter (Rush Creek Ward)
Loneliness is not something I have experienced in recent years, primarily because our house is full of small children who adore my wife and me, and my amazing wife happens to also be my best friend. I did, however, go through some experiences in my childhood that caused me to question my purpose on this earth and whether or not I wanted to “carry on.” Divorced parents, a years-long pornography addiction, anger, and financial instability distracted me from my true purpose on this earth, and made me feel alone.
Luckily I (with the Lord’s help, unbeknownst to me) never allowed those thoughts to develop into action, and I got to feel God’s love. That ultimately led to me realizing that this world and the heartbreaking experiences it has to offer are not what God has in store for any of us. What this world has to offer is not eternal. The negative experiences are not eternal. And He has promised us peace “not as the world giveth” (John 14:27). Christ, too, was alone, “forsaken” as it says in Matthew 27:46. I believe that He had to go without the Father’s presence, if only for a moment, to feel the same pain that we feel when we turn away from the Lord or feel that the world has turned on us. And His cry on the cross, I imagine, had to be the least peaceful moment in the most trying circumstances unknown to any mortal man or woman.
I testify that peace is possible in all of our mortal circumstances, especially in times of loneliness. We have a Savior who is always knocking at the door and will not forsake us (Deut. 31:6). And even less, He will never forget us (Isaiah 49:15-16).
Amanda Volk (North Brook Park Ward)
In Elder Gong’s recent General Conference address, he said: “When you come to church, if you see someone alone, will you please say hello and sit with him or her? This may not be your custom. The person may look or speak differently than you. And of course, as a fortune cookie might say, ‘A journey of gospel friendship and love begins with a first hello and no one sitting alone.’”
We moved to a new town when I was in seventh grade. After the first day of school, I cried and told my parents how much I missed my friends in our old town. My parents taught me that in order to make new friends, I needed to reach outside my comfort zone and be a good friend by getting to know people at my new school. With time, I made better friends than the friends I left!
There are times I feel lonely now as an adult, and I pray to Heavenly Father and ask who is someone I can reach out to with a text message or an invite to join me at the park or the temple or on a walk. I realize we all love human connection!
Proverbs 18:24: “A man that hath friends must shew himself friendly.”
Next Month's Question:
While technology is really good, it seems to also be very distracting. What are some ways we can alleviates those distractions from phones and computers?
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